the way i remember life on the farm...

       ...once upon a time there was a little girl who lived on a farm ...she played amongst the apple trees. one tree had branches that were broken in such a way as to hang down around her as if to be the rooms of a little house. she would play in there for hours. if she listened closely, as a breeze would pass through,she could hear Gods promise of her children playing, as she swept the floor with a bundle of branches,made coffee for her husband,soon to be home,in a  porcelain covered  coffee pot, with the rusty bottom,on her wooden palate stove. soon she would hear her mother calling and she would tuck the children in and leave a cup of coffee on the kitchen table...
      ...skipping off to be the child again. summer would bring lots of visitors,from near and far,family and friends were welcome anytime and strangers with stalled cars too. there was always a cup of coffee to be shared. summer meant haying bees, when family friends and relatives would bring their families out to the farm for a day of harvesting a lot of hay.the men in the fields,the women in the kitchen, the kids all playing. the milk house sinks were filled with ice water for 1 holding water melons,the other bottles of white rock sodas' with flavors of cream soda,black cherry,root beer,grape,orange,lemon-lime and cola. all bottled right in waukesha and sold in wooden crates. the women would be cooking up a storm of everything from hot dogs,sloppy joes, fresh fried chickens,potato salad, fresh cucumber w/onion and vinegar salad,devils food cake w/white frosting,cherry jello w/fresh raw home made whipped cream and hand cracked walnuts all whipped together,strawberry jello w/bananas, fresh picked apple pies,fresh picked rhubarb pies and of course home canned pickles,crab apples and more...  ...baseball  in the front yard-sometimes including the dogs, water fights in the back. sitting on the front porch to tie my keds and looking up just in time to see cousin kyle walk right off the top of a wagon full of hay and landing in a puff of dust like a cartoon character. then running fast as i could to his side to see if he was o'k. then of course laughing at him the rest of the day once finding out,thankfully, he just had the wind knocked out of him.
                           ...so much hay,so much food,so much work,so much fun,so much love...
    
    ...soon it was fall, time for high school football games, time for canning vegetables from the garden, time for the crisp fall air to seep in through the open evening windows as though it had traveled miles just to mingle with the aromas and sounds of moms' canning...   ...and bringing with it the smell of autum, the sound of the tractor and corn picker running in the darkness,only to slide the headlights across the walls each time it turned the corner by the road,and if the wind was just right you could either hear the sounds of the milking machines or an owl atop the barn or some nights, after the machines were quiet, you could hear the howlings of the family of red foxes' in the back hills. evenings also meant 'school nights' and home work and falling asleep either to the comforting sounds of mark singing songs for classes or plays or the soothing sound of wayne practicing his saxophone. they were each extremely talented. as they grew older mark went from an outstanding boy soprano to a rich baritone and once we all started voice lessons,we found wayne had an amazingly beautiful tenor voice,martha had a beautifully gentle alto,while i grew into a girl soprano with the rare quality of a BOY soprano(or so i was once told by maragret hawkins).
                 
              ...to hopefully be continued another day,please remember i am not a writer but a thinker...who is also a dyslexic stroke victim with basically half a brain from #MOYAMOYADISEASE ... so no need to tell me i cannot write or spell... i already know! however i do hope my thoughts and memories have touched you in some manner... also: thank you for stopping by! :)

A MAN IN A BRA...

     ...in a world overflowing with atrocities such as; genocides, war, human trafficking, famine, governmental corruption and deprivation, economic collapse, homelessness, oppression, civil unrest with police forces being used as armies, against it's citizens to strip them of their rights to peacefully protest said atrocities, while taking control of the press to TRY to stop the world from witnessing  ...plus, domestic abuse including but not limited to emotional and physical elimination of ones sense of self worth or worse through rape, incest, indifference, deprivation of  love, guidance, acceptance, safety in ones own home and so many  many more inhumane actions...

how can ANYONE be upset with an androgynous young man named ANDREJ PEJIC, who models BOTH menswear and women's wear (and amazingly well i might add) because he is now seen, in an advertisement campaign, WEARING A BRA UNDER HIS WOMEN'S CLOTHING!!!

                   (WARNING...THIS NEXT PARAGRAPH INCLUDES MILD SARCASM)

PLEASE,

      ...YES LETS HIDE THE CHILDREN   ...ELVIS IS SHAKING HIS HIPS! LITTLE RICHARD IS WEARING MAKE UP! THE BEATLES HAVE LONG HAIR! WHATEVER SHALL WE DO????  ...BUT,OH MY THAT LIBERACE PUTS ON A WONDERFUL SHOW! LETS HAVE FAMILY NIGHT AND WATCH A NICE WHOLESOME DORIS DAY AND ROCK HUDSON MOVIE !!!  ...HELLO!!!  ...LIBERACE WAS GAY!!!  ...ROCK HUDSON WAS GAY!!!   ...WERE YOUR LIVES RUINED BECAUSE OF THOSE FACTS???   ...NO!!!!  

   ...BECAUSE THOSE FACTS WERE NOT AND ARE NOT IMPORTANT AND SHOULD NEVER BE THE FACTORS OR ELEMENTS IN ANY ONES LIFE AS TO THE DEFINITION OF THEIR CHARACTER AS A PERSON !!!

LETS GET OUR HEADS OUT OF THE SAND AND TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT THE WORLD        

  ...FIND SOME PERSPECTIVE AS TO WHAT IS AND IS NOT HARMING OUR CHILDREN   OR OUR SOCIETY  ... A TRUE SENSE OF RIGHT AND WRONG! WE NEED TO STOP ANALYZING GRAINS OF SAND AND LOOK AT THE BIG PICTURE!

   ... LOOK CLOSELY AT THE AFOREMENTIONED ATROCITIES, AT CLIMATE CHANGE BRINGING EARTH QUAKES, TSUNAMIS', FLOODS, HURRICANES, MULTIPLE TORNADOES, DROUGHT, CONTAMINATED FOODS AND MORE...

  ...THEN AFTER DOING SO, IF YOU STILL FEEL MORE THREATENED BY A MAN WEARING A BRA...BY ALL MEANS PUT YOUR HEADS BACK IN THE SAND

                                                             ... BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE FREEDOM TO DO SO!

P.S. JESUS HAD LONG HAIR AND WORE ROBES...

#Moyamoyadisease info

http://www.medwire-news.md/39/98517/Stroke/Moyamoya_characteristics_in_the_USA_defined.html

http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/1180952-overview#a0101

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2680995/

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20358609

http://www.health.am/ab/more/single-gene-defect-can-lead-to-          stroke/

http://www.mendeley.com/research/seckel-syndrome-and-moyamoya/

http://www.stroke.org/site/PageServer?pagename=STROKE

http://ezinearticles.com/?Strokes-In-Young-People-Increasing&id=6630679

continued...it was quite a shock, in spring 2010, when doctor ZAIDAT showed my son and i images from my brain angiogram from dec 2008. it was my appointment to schedule my brain revascularization or bypass surgery of the brain, like they do in a heart bypass. so, for over a year i had been preparing myself emotionally for brain surgery,NOT the easiest thing to do. now,i had been trying,along with several doctors, for years,with no luck, to get medical records from 1992or93 when i had a brain bleed while working out at a gym and my diagnosis about a year after that of lyme disease. well,2 weeks prior to this appointment for surgery ~ a doctor had finally found 1 written report from 1996 comparing an MRI done in 96 to one in 1994. 
on the top of the 1st page it said the exam was NORMAL! luckily she kept reading. the report went on to say nothing had changed since the MRI in 1994 concerning the blockage found in the right internal carotid artery and the right mid cerebral artery,it went on to talk about tangled blood vessels and the suggestion of surgery of the carotid artery. i.m sitting there listening to the doctor read rapidly through the report, i had to stop her and ask her to repeat the first mention of a blockage in a carotid artery. see i knew what that was because my dad had had that....basically the same time i did,difference being ...i was NEVER TOLD about mine! 
she went on reading again, rapidly repeating about the blockage to the right mid cerebral artery,at which time i stopped her again...i'm like,WAIT-WHAT?? i said,NO ONE EVER TOLD ME ANY OF THIS!!!! she went on to say something like,oh i'm sure they did but you forgot...i STOPPED HER AGAIN!! i said NO,NO,NO,NO, all i was told at the time was i had lyme disease and the brain bleed was probly a one time vascular event. she looked at me funny and i said...my dad was going through the same thing about that same time only they had to cancel his carotid surgery at the last minute because they found an aneurysm. how could i remember the details about my dad and forget them about me? i asked, is there a follow up report? is there anything about my HAVING surgery? ...she looked at me and said NO, i saw her whole demeanor change,she was stunned,she realized she had just told me all of the answers to all the questions i had been asking since 1993. 
i had already been diagnosed with #MOYAMOYADISEASE by this time yes and had been preparing myself  for brain surgery. but we both realized in that moment that she was holding in her hand a 2 page report that may change everything! ...and 2 weeks later...it did. to be con't on september 14,2012 post
     

welcome to my first blog

welcome to my first blog. i am here trying to articulate the reality of how i view #MOYAMOYADISEASE,with my own personal spin on living with it. instead of tweeting impersonal links and medical jargon all the time.

blocked blood vessels in my brain grow new blood vessels to supply blood and oxygen to my brain. however,because of #moyamoya,the new blood vessels grow like a root bound house plant grows new ROOTS,tangled and basically useless.  ...some as small as a hair growing into my brain.   ...what happens when these brain cells are deprived of blood and oxygen? they die. 

#moyamoya disease is progressive...which means it keeps happening... over and over and over and over...throughout one or both sides of the brain... ;like dandelions taking over parts of the brain instead of the yard; until you have a rupture with bleeding into the brain,possibly causing immediate death, or so many blockages you simply have no more blood or oxygen supply to your brain...causing brain death.

there are forms of surgery for #moyamoya that work best in children and work well for some adults. more than one surgery may be necessary. i however am not a candidate for surgery as i was misdiagnosed from at least 1994 till 2008.

i have been fortunate though, in that during the time i have had #moyamoya healthy blood vessels were able to grow from my left brain to my right. these left brain vessels are the best supply of blood and oxygen i have to my right brain,there is however a very large portion of my right brain WITHOUT supply.